As a child I was obsessed with classic films. The films of Vivien Leigh, Elizabeth Taylor, Cary Grant, Audrey Hepburn, Clark Gable, Paul Newman, Mae West, Doris Day, Rock Hudson... the list goes on. It was rather an odd collection to fascinate the mind of a six year old but fascinate me they did. As soon as I learned to read (I was a late bloomer only learning at the age of nine) I swiftly converted my love of watching these mesmerizing individuals on screen to one of reading their life stories. However, it was only the women whose biographies I eagerly checked out from the Leaside Public Library. Perhaps it was because I had learned to read through the Nancy Drew series (my father and I used to go to vintage and second hand book stores on Sundays after Church and scour the racks for original copies for my collection) and preferred female protagonists. Or maybe there was a deeper reason. Regardless of the reason Elizabeth Taylor and Vivian Leigh were the primary focuses of my attention and I devoured their biographies (I must say not the most appropriate of reading for a pre teen) and hung their photos on my wall (a framed photo of each still is featured on my cabinet). I even cut my hair at the age of eleven to match that of Elizabeth Taylor in Father of the Bride (an unmitigated disaster. Unlike Elizabeth Taylor I had the misfortune of going through puberty at the time of the decision and the combined effect of the unruly short mop of hair, the mass of pimples and the giant framed spectacles perched on my nose- in conjunction with the braces and head gear is enough to make me recoil in horror even now).
That's why when Elizabeth Taylor passed away yesterday I was personally touched. She had been a role model to me since I was a young child. The roles she played, not too far from the personality she herself cultivated- impassioned women of intellect and resolve- undoubtedly had an impact on the woman I aspire to be and the woman I am today. I remember vividly driving up to our family cottage in Gatineau whilst reciting the lines of Maggie 'The Cat' from Tennessee Williams' Cat on a Hot Tin Roof even today (my favorite role of hers). However the role that has haunted me has always been that of Angela in A Place in the Sun. I think it was the first time I realized the seductive and destroying quality of money in the world of Romance- a lesson I have not forgotten. When I think of her it is therefore the conviction and passion of the roles she played that strikes me first (the reason I loved her as a child) and then her significant contributions in the fight against HIV (her compassion and drive to change the lives of this much maligned minority has impassioned me over the last few years) which I remember secondly. It is only as an afterthought that I remember her great physical beauty, but when I do remember it (and how could you not) I remember her in her role as Angela. And it is these images, and the words "tell mama, tell mama all..." which haunt me.
